Tuesday 30th January 2024 I sat on these rocks for the last time today. Maybe I will come back as a visitor, but this will be the last time I do this loop up to Curbar Edge from my house. My surgery is on Thursday and then the house move in two weeks are peeling me away from these rocks. The routine I have carved out over the last fourteen years. My two feet and legs leave my garden, heading through the village and weaving up the hill to arrive at the rocky edges.
This resonates so strongly Jen. I moved to the Lake District 13 years ago. I'd always wanted to live there, and assumed I would be there for ever. But my family are elsewhere and when I became a grandmother, that link was stronger than anything else, and so I left. I left my "rocks", Loughrigg, which I'd climbed almost every week for 13 years. The leaving wasn't sad or painful, the decision had been made, and I was too busy with practicalities to feel any emotion. Today I came back and went up Loughrigg again, after an absence of just 7 weeks. It's still here. My friends are still here, even my lung capacity is still here after no hills for nearly two months! But there is emotion this time, a realisation that I have actually gone and I'm now an outsider, a visitor. It is surreal, everything looking familiar but as if one step removed. Happily I'd already started work on a book about Loughrigg before I decided to move, so that - for now - is my umbilical cord. A part of you will always be there on Curbar Edge even if you don't go back. Though I'm sure you will. And your resilience will carry you through all the new adventures that lie ahead.
Thanks Eileen and hope you are settling in your new spot! I definitely feel excited about our move next week. I think with having to give up running, and constantly being reminded of all my running paths each day meant it felt like I didn't quite leave 'on my terms'. But now the surgery is out of the way and I can hopefully rehab to a level where I can get out in the hills, I feel more positive. I am sure the rocks and routes in Scotland will be just as dear to me in 14 years!
These past moments are what make us who we are now. We need to sit with them as you say and feel all of those emotions. You shall feel many of them again in your new place that will become home. Leave some that don't serve you (although we can never totally leave them) and take the ones that do. Looking forward to seeing and continuing to be part of this new chapter of your lives. We must never stop exploring and bring curious if this is our way. Go explore and discover the new things that are waiting for you.
This resonates so strongly Jen. I moved to the Lake District 13 years ago. I'd always wanted to live there, and assumed I would be there for ever. But my family are elsewhere and when I became a grandmother, that link was stronger than anything else, and so I left. I left my "rocks", Loughrigg, which I'd climbed almost every week for 13 years. The leaving wasn't sad or painful, the decision had been made, and I was too busy with practicalities to feel any emotion. Today I came back and went up Loughrigg again, after an absence of just 7 weeks. It's still here. My friends are still here, even my lung capacity is still here after no hills for nearly two months! But there is emotion this time, a realisation that I have actually gone and I'm now an outsider, a visitor. It is surreal, everything looking familiar but as if one step removed. Happily I'd already started work on a book about Loughrigg before I decided to move, so that - for now - is my umbilical cord. A part of you will always be there on Curbar Edge even if you don't go back. Though I'm sure you will. And your resilience will carry you through all the new adventures that lie ahead.
Thanks Eileen and hope you are settling in your new spot! I definitely feel excited about our move next week. I think with having to give up running, and constantly being reminded of all my running paths each day meant it felt like I didn't quite leave 'on my terms'. But now the surgery is out of the way and I can hopefully rehab to a level where I can get out in the hills, I feel more positive. I am sure the rocks and routes in Scotland will be just as dear to me in 14 years!
These past moments are what make us who we are now. We need to sit with them as you say and feel all of those emotions. You shall feel many of them again in your new place that will become home. Leave some that don't serve you (although we can never totally leave them) and take the ones that do. Looking forward to seeing and continuing to be part of this new chapter of your lives. We must never stop exploring and bring curious if this is our way. Go explore and discover the new things that are waiting for you.
I’m looking forward to seeing pics of your Scottish rocks.